I just don’t understand.

i feel like a black hole, incapable of holding any light.

every smile, every laugh

desperately trying to erase the sad thoughts lingering in the background.

masking every step, blending in

but no matter how hard i try

i still find myself spilling my guts, with this pen to this paper

telling it things i wouldn’t utter to a soul.

to be enough i tell myself:

loose a little weight, buy some cuter clothes, be anything but you because you will Never be enough

honestly speaking:

sometimes i’d be happier being anyone but myself